Update

It’s been several months since I gave you a life update. In fact, it was last May when I updated what is going on in my personal and family life.  Covid 19 is still raging in the US as I type this.  I don’t think that will change.  This whole pandemic I find very, well I’m not sure what term to use.  I want to say frustrating, but I don’t think it’s one hundred percent accurate.  The one thing that makes me the most angry about the pandemic are people who think science is a farce. Science is not a vast conspiracy.  I just find the concept so perplexing. Anyway, there is nothing I can do.  I can only take care of myself and my family as best I can and hope others self rule does not harm or interfere with my family. I wonder where we will all end up.  How the future will change because of this, no one will know what is ahead.  I keep waiting for this great era of humanity beginning in my lifetime. I no longer think that is going to happen.

Once thing that has changed since this pandemic has come on is my stress level. It’s gone way down.  I’ve been feeling a lot better. Being at home has been good for me. I really have to be careful that I don’t allow the staying at home to become more detrimental than helpful.  So I have started going out a little bit here and there.  I still try to stay at home as much as possible but every now and then I need a break. It will be interesting to see what the fall has in store for all of us!

My son has been getting all his therapy via the internet.  It’s worked well for the most part.  My one complaint is that all of the various doctors and therapists all use different online conferencing software.  Each one is different from the other.  It’s so confusing to log on! If anything positive can come of this is that the internet will (hopefully) be faster, and wireless communication around the globe will take a giant leap forward.

This month our refrigerator, that is only a few years old, broke.  The compressor went out.  It took LG a week to be able to send out a repair man.  After a few days I told my husband to buy a dorm fridge.  He wasn’t too happy about spending money on that.  We really needed it to keep a few things cold.  Milk being a major item for us.  Now it is fixed.  We ended up having to toss out about $300 or more dollars worth of food.  The hardest was a bunch of steaks my husband bought.  We tried to eat as much as we could, but we couldn’t get to everything. Our microwave also broke several months back and had to be completely replaced.  As bad things come in threes, you guessed it, our washing machine in now making a horrible noise on the spin cycle.  We can still use it so far, but it is going to take two weeks to get a repair man to come out.

In August, our beloved Australian Shepard rescue dog Boo became ill.  Even as a senior dog she has so much energy and is always happy. She started having diarrhea.  In the middle of the night she would wake us up to let her out.  Which she never does. We thought it must have been something that she ate.  So we waited. On the fourth day she started vomiting.   She looked so tired and exhausted so we finally took her to the vet.

At first when I contacted the vet they could not get her in for a few days.  She was so exhausted and wasn’t her usual happy self.  She also would not eat or drink.  So I called again and asked for a certain vet we have seen  before several times.  He let me bring her in and he saw her in between other appointments.  She was there for several hours before they called me.  Luckily, nothing showed up on her x-rays so they gave her several shots and fluids to recover. Then they gave us two prescriptions for her and special food.

When I picked her up she already seemed much better.  You could really see it in her eyes.  I think the IV really helped her.  She was pretty weak.  Thankfully, it’s been three days and she has been able to keep food down and has not had any diarrhea.  The only thing that is a reminder of her illness is her hind quarters.  She had diarrhea so badly that we had to cut her hair.  She would not cooperate with us.  Honestly, it looks like we took a weed whacker to her back end.  The poor groomer next time we take her in.  Well, it’s hair.  It grows back right?

How has back to school been coming along for you?  We have just started in our state to consider what to do.  It is up to each district which makes sense. A small town in the northern part of the state doesn’t have to worry about Covid transmission as much as a metropolitan school district with tens of thousands of students. I think our local public school is going to do a combination of on-line and in-person learning.  I have no idea what that looks like.  I think they have had enough time to think about how to work this.  I’m sure there will be a few kinks in there, but at least they have some idea of what it will be like thanks to last spring.

Our son’s school has told us that they will accommodate everyone’s wishes.  Since it is a private school, and they have less than 30 students it’s easy for them to do.  When we did have lock down at the end of last year they were able to adapt quickly.

So they have given us the option of attending in person, doing part time in person and part time online, or completely online.  We have decided to send our son in person. Since his desensitization therapy was interrupted due to Covid 19 we have decided it is more important for him to be there in person.  He needs to get out of the house.  I’m am worried about Covid, but I have to weigh the bigger of the two worries.  Covid versus his education, social development, maturity and anxiety/depression work.  The latter wins.  He will struggle but now he has four years left of school.  He is a little behind in some subjects due to the last few years in and out of school. There are so many factors at work here.  I am expecting there may be several shut downs through out the year.

We have been working all summer to catch up but still have a long way to go.  Twice a week he has math tutoring online with his math teacher.  He is right where he should be in Math so we are pleased about that.  I worked with him on English.  He is having trouble in certain parts like subjects and predicates.  He usually does well but for some reason he is stuck on this.  I think that he is maybe working too fast and not reading the directions as well as he should.  (Thanks ADHD Inattentive!) He is doing really well on spelling.  I am hoping to have spelling wrapped up by Christmas. Then he should not have to have any spelling for the rest of high school.  Minus specific words for Science or Foreign Language classes.

My main things are that he should be  good at math and good at grammar/writing.  I want him to be able to write in a professional setting for what ever type of job he gets.  I’m sure many of you have seen my writing isn’t as good as I would like. I’m sure the grammar Nazi’s are going crazy every time the read something I write.  There are some parts of my education that I feel was not emphasized or watched like it should have been. That is why I am very involved in my son’s education.  I’m  probably too involved.  At least now society has so many things kids can do to improve like tutors or learning centers in addition the regular school’s.

As far as his therapy is going he now has three therapists.  Each for a different area.  The newest is a food therapist.  He has had food therapy before, which is done by occupational therapists in the U.S., for Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD).  He was in therapy for food for a year when he was in the fourth grade. I stopped it after a year because it made no change in his eating. E will not eat any fruits or veggies.  None at all.  I can only get him to have something if I blend it completely smooth in a smoothie. I can’t do smoothies too often or he will get sick of them and refuse to eat them.  I learned that lesson with muffins.

Then when he was inpatient they suggested he go from that inpatient straight to inpatient at an eating disorder clinic. He was 11. (He’s 14 now).  After seven days in the eating disorder clinic they discharged him saying they were doing more harm and they were not sure he had an eating disorder.  It’s the second time where I made a parenting mistake by not listening to mother’s intuition.  The first time was when I put him in inpatient care for anxiety/depression and then my second was inpatient for eating.  I vowed never to make a mistake like that again.  Others in my family still want to go by what the professionals say.  While, I will always defer to professionals whenever possible, I’ve learned they don’t know everything and don’t know my son like I do.  I’m not some mother who thinks medicine or science is some sort of racket.  I definitely think they know for the most part what they are talking about.  I can see, however, that they misjudged the situation with my son.  So when his old school wanted to make changes for him that only made their life easier I didn’t back down.  I knew it wasn’t right for him.  My husband wanted me to listen to them, but I refused.  My son and I are extremely close.  He doesn’t tell me everything but I can see a lot about him by watching his mannerisms and how he is in situations. I knew I was right and it turned out I was.

Then last year we took him back to the eating disorder clinic but on outpatient therapy.  After three months they decided he didn’t have the eating disorder ARFID but all his eating issues were the result of SPD.  Which we knew.  My husband said “If you knew then why did we pay and run all over town for this therapy?” I told him, that if he continues to have issues with, in this case, eating we can show that we as his parents have done everything we possibly can to help him.  No doctor, agency, teacher, other parent etc can say we have not helped him.  I know we have gone above and beyond what most parents would and could do.  We have been told that.  I just want to be able not to constantly worry about him.  At least as far as eating goes. I don’t want to leave any stone un-turned.

I already like this new clinic better.  His new therapist (OT) for eating has gotten me real excited about working on this which was a feat in itself.  We’ve already had our second meeting via internet with her.  I wasn’t sure how feeding therapy would work online but it has gone well.  She is going to have us do brushing therapy and a wash cloth therapy trick at home.  I’ve already ordered the brushes off Amazon.  Fingers crossed. I told her that all I would like at this point is if he could eat 3 different types of veggies and 3 types of fruit.  That should be enough for him to have a balanced diet.  I’m exhausted but now is the time.  Fingers crossed.

This is my update.  I’m pretty sure it’s complete.  I write more personal stuff about myself when I review my goals.  So look for those posts in the archive if you are interested.  Until the next update, stay safe and healthy!

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